Post by "Vicious" Vince Vegas on Apr 19, 2013 10:24:29 GMT -5
Triumph returns to air from commercial break just after the triangle tag match completes.
Welcome back to Triumph folks. We have had quite show thus far, from the Over the Top Battle Royale that we opened with to the Triangle Tag Match we just witnessed, The show has been jammed packed with action! Our sponsors are going to be happy with programming of this caliber
That's hard to argue with Al. Triumph, brought to you by the good folks at Vagisil. "Vagisil: If you weren't a slut, we'd be out of business."
Speaking of irritable itches, I'm sure "Vicious" Vince Vegas will be itching for a win this week when he faces his opponent at Rise of the Fighty fighty persons next week, Jack Tracks. We haven't seen much of Vince since Dustin Delta walked all over him in an Ultimate X match a couple weeks ago, but rumor has it he turned down an invitation to join Jaggeroth and his horde of heels and stayed home last week as a precaution.We all know as far as Jaggeroth is concerned if you're not with him, then you are against him, and he is fine with that.
Well, "Vicious" Vince will have an opportunity to put all of that behind him tonight and get back into the win column in our first ever "Las Vegas Classic" in which Vince will get choose any match type or stipulation he wishes to turn the tides in his favor going into "Rise of the Fighty fighty persons".
Jack Tracks' actions last week, defying The Horde, was just the storm Vince was hoping for, as it looks like Jaggeroth has forgot about the declined invitation in lieu of more pressing business. The race car driving superstar had best be ready for anything tonight! Charlie Coors is in the ring ready announce the match.
Our next match is the "Las Vegas Classic" match. Introducing first hailing from Las Vegas, Nevada, standing at 6 feet 3 inches tall, weighing in at 235 pounds, he is...
THE STAR OF THE SHOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!
LL Cool J's "Mama Said Knock You Out" begins to play over the the GHW arena sound system. The camera pans around the crowd for a moment, to find a few scattered fans wearing "Dustin Delta Deserved It" t-shirts who cheer, but the vast majority of the fans are growing tired of Vince and reign a chorus of "Boos" down on him as his music begins to play.
As the line "Boom! Explosions!" plays fireworks explode from both sides of the ramp and "Vicious" Vince Vegas explodes from within the sparks, hopping on one foot and raising one hand above his head. Vince makes his way to the ring with a smug, self assured smirk painted across his face, confident that the deck is stacked in his favor with his choice of stipulation. Vince stops to flex his biceps for a female fan in the front row, before rolling into the ring and picking up a microphone.
Decisions, Decisions. The Las Vegas Classic, a match named for "The Vicious One" in which I get to choose the fate of poor Jack Tracks. You must have pissed off the wrong person last week Jack to get your fate put into my hands. I've been thinking about how to torture you all week. I've been like a kid trying to make a decision on his Christmas list the day the Sears Wishbook arrived on the doorstep. There are just so many choices!
At first I thought of the obvious choice, I'd call the Logging Crew out here and we'd have a 3 on 1 handicap match. The Brute of Beaubears has taken a back seat to the Perverse Pulp Peeler Big Jim as of late, and I'm sure he wouldn't mind taking his aggression out on a man with flowing blonde hair like Jack Tracks. He always used to tell me that no man should have hair longer than 3 inches, unless it's on his chest or his balls.
But the more I thought about it, with that extra chromosome Jack has, every match he has ever been involved in was a handicap match. That race car he drives even has a blue parking pass dangling from the rear view mirror. So, the handicap match was out.
Vince stops for a moment and wipes the sweat from his bald head several times as the crowd jeers at his distasteful comments.
Then it came to me. Cletus was right, unless you're in a metal band, or ride a motorcycle in a gang, a man should not have hair that long! So the stipulation I choose is...
a HAIR VS HAIR MATCH!
Vince laughs as the crowd reacts to his stipulation. Vince is bald for Gods sake. There is no doubt he would live up to his end of the bargain, But before Vince has a chance to bask in the crowd reaction for long, he is interrupted by a familiar face.
TBC...
Welcome back to Triumph folks. We have had quite show thus far, from the Over the Top Battle Royale that we opened with to the Triangle Tag Match we just witnessed, The show has been jammed packed with action! Our sponsors are going to be happy with programming of this caliber
That's hard to argue with Al. Triumph, brought to you by the good folks at Vagisil. "Vagisil: If you weren't a slut, we'd be out of business."
Speaking of irritable itches, I'm sure "Vicious" Vince Vegas will be itching for a win this week when he faces his opponent at Rise of the Fighty fighty persons next week, Jack Tracks. We haven't seen much of Vince since Dustin Delta walked all over him in an Ultimate X match a couple weeks ago, but rumor has it he turned down an invitation to join Jaggeroth and his horde of heels and stayed home last week as a precaution.We all know as far as Jaggeroth is concerned if you're not with him, then you are against him, and he is fine with that.
Well, "Vicious" Vince will have an opportunity to put all of that behind him tonight and get back into the win column in our first ever "Las Vegas Classic" in which Vince will get choose any match type or stipulation he wishes to turn the tides in his favor going into "Rise of the Fighty fighty persons".
Jack Tracks' actions last week, defying The Horde, was just the storm Vince was hoping for, as it looks like Jaggeroth has forgot about the declined invitation in lieu of more pressing business. The race car driving superstar had best be ready for anything tonight! Charlie Coors is in the ring ready announce the match.
Our next match is the "Las Vegas Classic" match. Introducing first hailing from Las Vegas, Nevada, standing at 6 feet 3 inches tall, weighing in at 235 pounds, he is...
THE STAR OF THE SHOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!
LL Cool J's "Mama Said Knock You Out" begins to play over the the GHW arena sound system. The camera pans around the crowd for a moment, to find a few scattered fans wearing "Dustin Delta Deserved It" t-shirts who cheer, but the vast majority of the fans are growing tired of Vince and reign a chorus of "Boos" down on him as his music begins to play.
As the line "Boom! Explosions!" plays fireworks explode from both sides of the ramp and "Vicious" Vince Vegas explodes from within the sparks, hopping on one foot and raising one hand above his head. Vince makes his way to the ring with a smug, self assured smirk painted across his face, confident that the deck is stacked in his favor with his choice of stipulation. Vince stops to flex his biceps for a female fan in the front row, before rolling into the ring and picking up a microphone.
Decisions, Decisions. The Las Vegas Classic, a match named for "The Vicious One" in which I get to choose the fate of poor Jack Tracks. You must have pissed off the wrong person last week Jack to get your fate put into my hands. I've been thinking about how to torture you all week. I've been like a kid trying to make a decision on his Christmas list the day the Sears Wishbook arrived on the doorstep. There are just so many choices!
At first I thought of the obvious choice, I'd call the Logging Crew out here and we'd have a 3 on 1 handicap match. The Brute of Beaubears has taken a back seat to the Perverse Pulp Peeler Big Jim as of late, and I'm sure he wouldn't mind taking his aggression out on a man with flowing blonde hair like Jack Tracks. He always used to tell me that no man should have hair longer than 3 inches, unless it's on his chest or his balls.
But the more I thought about it, with that extra chromosome Jack has, every match he has ever been involved in was a handicap match. That race car he drives even has a blue parking pass dangling from the rear view mirror. So, the handicap match was out.
Vince stops for a moment and wipes the sweat from his bald head several times as the crowd jeers at his distasteful comments.
Then it came to me. Cletus was right, unless you're in a metal band, or ride a motorcycle in a gang, a man should not have hair that long! So the stipulation I choose is...
a HAIR VS HAIR MATCH!
Vince laughs as the crowd reacts to his stipulation. Vince is bald for Gods sake. There is no doubt he would live up to his end of the bargain, But before Vince has a chance to bask in the crowd reaction for long, he is interrupted by a familiar face.
TBC...