Post by Psychotic Circus on Oct 12, 2012 2:32:01 GMT -5
-The scene begins oddly enough as GHW comes back from commercial, and a Mitt Romney banner was flowing in the bottom corner of the dark screen.-
"Aaaaah, yes. It's that lovely time again. Every four years we, as American's get together and pick between candidate A, and candidate B... completely forgetting our forefathers and pushing candidate C under the rug..."
-A small light turned on, giving up it's meaningless existence in the form of a beam of rays to bestow a clear view of the speaking voice, the GHW champion, Jaggeroth.-
"I usually don't get mixed up with the water cooler debaters, mostly cause I don't like any of the people I have to sadly call co-workers since I collect a paycheck from this...company."
-He titled up the GHW title to hang from his shoulder and sighed heavily with his face pointed to the ground.-
"But I must not hold my tongue any further! Finally there is a political side that I know I will feel right at home in. That's right! No longer will I fight tyranny with even more deliciously evil tyranny! For I have had a vision, and I've been seeing everything all wrong...."
-He straightened up in the chair with one more sigh before his face lifted up and proclaimed to the world....-
"I, Jaggeroth, Demon of Elkhorn Valley and master of the pit...have switched from being apart of the War Party, and have joined up to be a card carrying member of the Republican Party! That's right! Nick Carson, of all people, has been up my ass for longer than I care to admit, and I finally sat down and thought about it... how could a man who stuck his dick in a corpse be wrong about a political party? They have to be beyond demented then for him to want to be their poster child. All this talk about family values, equal opportunity for all and freedom from government with a track record that says the exact opposite...it makes the barren hole in my chest all warm and fuzzy inside. It's one thing to admit you're evil like me, but come on, if you saw me walking down your street, you'd know it, so there's no use in hiding it for me...but to outright lie like a complete Judeus in front of millions of people and have a select few lap up the shit oozing from your chin, now that is a feat of evil that even I couldn't pull off without some plastic surgery and acting lessons...."
"A party that wants social and international reform and...peace, the bastard child of lazy fucks and total pansies...yet, they go ahead and start wars abroad, limit our freedoms and start to tell us that we've never been more free and protected in our whole lives because we set third world countries on fire....and they got away with it. Hell, even in the sinister world of pro-wrestling, I couldn't get away with rape...let alone religious genocide. They say from one mouth that they'll give you comfort in the night, and threaten China with subtlety out the other....false hope, mixed with a healthy serving of war declaration...a nice touch."
"A fair shake for the working man, that's another rib tickler. Corporations are considered people to the republican's, the real driving force of America in their eyes. We let them do business here, they make tons of money, but only for themselves...so we need to tax them at a rate less than the man who breaks his back for them every day in a factory. Serving evil, praising evil blindly as his body erodes from years of useless, thankless toil while those who do nothing but paper work and martini lunches laugh their dicks off at him...probably while snorting crack off a hooker's ass. Because that's the American way! Never repay those who rightfully deserve it, and fairness only for those who own your ass so hard that they might as well brand their symbol on it. But why stop at not charging them a damn dime? Why not relieve them of all social responsibility? Why not make loop holes in the law so they can get away with murder if need be? Why not let them ruin our environment? Can you imagine the Mississippi river turned into the world's biggest oil slick? Or even the Grand Canyon being filled with oozing and glowing barrels, turning it into Love Canal 2012?!..."
"And I can hear your feeble thoughts...BUT-BUT-How can the Dark Lord Almighty join a party that taunts christianity as its driving force? Simple, you faces of fuck! I want your rivers to flow with blood, your cities to burn as the masses loot and riot! Using religion to further your wars, your corruption and hiding behind it to further send us down the spiral will finally make you all open your damn eyes...it doesn't really matter who you vote for, I can feel it in my blood... The NDAA was signed into law, your freedoms are already null and void. The uprising is coming, nothing is going to stop it unless you love being whipped like a damn piece of antique farm equipment. The republican's are just going to harbor in the dark days a lot sooner... Martial Law is always fun, and never fails to transform my blood into steam once the masses join in on all the fun. Can you imagine it? The fun? All the merriment you will have once the streets are clustered with bodies and you can finally take a large stick to your boss's face and bash it in repeatedly? ....Wouldn't life be so much simpler?....If only we could see-"
-The scene suddenly freezes in place, leaving Jaggeroth's face looking contorted.-
"I think we've heard enough douchebaggery for one night."
-In front of Jaggeroth's face, Vladimir Strife walks out in a two dollar suit and tie.-
"America, your vote counts. So send a message to Washington and tell them that real change is coming. It's that, or else this Turd Copter's vision could sadly become a reality. Vote Gary Johnson, 2012."
-Vlad lifts his arm and gives the camera a smile along with a thumbs up before it fades away.-
"Aaaaah, yes. It's that lovely time again. Every four years we, as American's get together and pick between candidate A, and candidate B... completely forgetting our forefathers and pushing candidate C under the rug..."
-A small light turned on, giving up it's meaningless existence in the form of a beam of rays to bestow a clear view of the speaking voice, the GHW champion, Jaggeroth.-
"I usually don't get mixed up with the water cooler debaters, mostly cause I don't like any of the people I have to sadly call co-workers since I collect a paycheck from this...company."
-He titled up the GHW title to hang from his shoulder and sighed heavily with his face pointed to the ground.-
"But I must not hold my tongue any further! Finally there is a political side that I know I will feel right at home in. That's right! No longer will I fight tyranny with even more deliciously evil tyranny! For I have had a vision, and I've been seeing everything all wrong...."
-He straightened up in the chair with one more sigh before his face lifted up and proclaimed to the world....-
"I, Jaggeroth, Demon of Elkhorn Valley and master of the pit...have switched from being apart of the War Party, and have joined up to be a card carrying member of the Republican Party! That's right! Nick Carson, of all people, has been up my ass for longer than I care to admit, and I finally sat down and thought about it... how could a man who stuck his dick in a corpse be wrong about a political party? They have to be beyond demented then for him to want to be their poster child. All this talk about family values, equal opportunity for all and freedom from government with a track record that says the exact opposite...it makes the barren hole in my chest all warm and fuzzy inside. It's one thing to admit you're evil like me, but come on, if you saw me walking down your street, you'd know it, so there's no use in hiding it for me...but to outright lie like a complete Judeus in front of millions of people and have a select few lap up the shit oozing from your chin, now that is a feat of evil that even I couldn't pull off without some plastic surgery and acting lessons...."
"A party that wants social and international reform and...peace, the bastard child of lazy fucks and total pansies...yet, they go ahead and start wars abroad, limit our freedoms and start to tell us that we've never been more free and protected in our whole lives because we set third world countries on fire....and they got away with it. Hell, even in the sinister world of pro-wrestling, I couldn't get away with rape...let alone religious genocide. They say from one mouth that they'll give you comfort in the night, and threaten China with subtlety out the other....false hope, mixed with a healthy serving of war declaration...a nice touch."
"A fair shake for the working man, that's another rib tickler. Corporations are considered people to the republican's, the real driving force of America in their eyes. We let them do business here, they make tons of money, but only for themselves...so we need to tax them at a rate less than the man who breaks his back for them every day in a factory. Serving evil, praising evil blindly as his body erodes from years of useless, thankless toil while those who do nothing but paper work and martini lunches laugh their dicks off at him...probably while snorting crack off a hooker's ass. Because that's the American way! Never repay those who rightfully deserve it, and fairness only for those who own your ass so hard that they might as well brand their symbol on it. But why stop at not charging them a damn dime? Why not relieve them of all social responsibility? Why not make loop holes in the law so they can get away with murder if need be? Why not let them ruin our environment? Can you imagine the Mississippi river turned into the world's biggest oil slick? Or even the Grand Canyon being filled with oozing and glowing barrels, turning it into Love Canal 2012?!..."
"And I can hear your feeble thoughts...BUT-BUT-How can the Dark Lord Almighty join a party that taunts christianity as its driving force? Simple, you faces of fuck! I want your rivers to flow with blood, your cities to burn as the masses loot and riot! Using religion to further your wars, your corruption and hiding behind it to further send us down the spiral will finally make you all open your damn eyes...it doesn't really matter who you vote for, I can feel it in my blood... The NDAA was signed into law, your freedoms are already null and void. The uprising is coming, nothing is going to stop it unless you love being whipped like a damn piece of antique farm equipment. The republican's are just going to harbor in the dark days a lot sooner... Martial Law is always fun, and never fails to transform my blood into steam once the masses join in on all the fun. Can you imagine it? The fun? All the merriment you will have once the streets are clustered with bodies and you can finally take a large stick to your boss's face and bash it in repeatedly? ....Wouldn't life be so much simpler?....If only we could see-"
-The scene suddenly freezes in place, leaving Jaggeroth's face looking contorted.-
"I think we've heard enough douchebaggery for one night."
-In front of Jaggeroth's face, Vladimir Strife walks out in a two dollar suit and tie.-
"America, your vote counts. So send a message to Washington and tell them that real change is coming. It's that, or else this Turd Copter's vision could sadly become a reality. Vote Gary Johnson, 2012."
-Vlad lifts his arm and gives the camera a smile along with a thumbs up before it fades away.-
