Post by Xantaxm on Mar 17, 2009 0:23:42 GMT -5
GHW comes back from commercial after the Special Guest Referee match on Monday Night Combat. Xantaxm is backstage in a plush locker room sitting on a black leather sofa. In front of him is a small cocktail table with a large mug of green beer. He smirks as the camera shifts from the table to his face.
"Good evening to all of you unintelligent Gods and Heretics Wrestling fans. I am speaking briefly tonight to fill in the blanks that have still been unanswered for this weekend's pay-per-view extravaganza, Total Carnage. Before I begin, let me first explain this big green concoction in front of me. It is a symbol of St. Patrick's Day, the day that is heralded by average joes and people of all descents. It doesn't matter what you had for dinner! Because it's just another excuse for you to go out and drink and try to forget the miserable lives that you're living. No one cares about the Irish or their traditions. No one cares who St. Patrick is. Heck, no one could even name one successful irishman. You don't see any successful Irish Superstars in GHW or any other feds. What happened to The Irishman in GHW? He disappeared under some rainbow and has never been seen since. It's a good damn thing there won't be a Team Ireland next month at World Warz because I don't think the country could bear to see the embarrassment. I won't get ahead of myself though. World Warz III is next month, and everyone knows that it's the year of Team Xantland. Anyhow, let me take a sip of this beer for the sake of everything not Irish."
Xantaxm grabs the mug and takes a hearty swig of it. Within seconds, he spits it out to the side of the sofa and makes a very bitter face. Then, anger sets in. Xantaxm puts the mug back on the table and shouts to crewman.
"Get this damn thing out of here! It tastes more like dye than it does beer! Get me a water!"
Xantaxm wipes his mouth, which is faintly colored green from the beer.
"As I was saying, the elite do not drink this kind of crap. It just goes to show that all of these countries that celebrate this Irish holiday are not truly patriotic. They embrace another country's culture mindlessly. In Xantland, we're all on the same page, and we are all focused on the same mission. That mission is to hold GHW gold and shut down the opposition. The Anti-X group has failed horribly in trying to stop us or bring me down, and this trend will continue. This brings me to Total Carnage. At Total Carnage, there will be a number of Titles that will come back to the X-Forces. The first is the Lieutenant X-Force Title. DUMB GANGSTA hasn't won a match in weeks, and the way he has lost his matches is enough to send him into early retirement. If I were he, I would just hand that Title back over and go find myself a new profession. Or maybe he could get back to his roots and live in the projects selling drugs and illegal firearms. In any event, YG will lose to whoever the #1 contender is from Combat, and the good thing is, all of those competitors are X-Force Superstars, so no matter what, the Lt. X-Force strap is coming home. The next Title that is coming home to the X-Forces is the Captain X-Force Championship. ForSakeN will defend the belt against Eric The Torture and Samoa Machine. The whole point of this segment was to address this match, so for those of you at home getting impatient, tough luck. I'll get to the point when I want to get to the point. These three Captain Superstars will fight in a triple threat match, but here's the thing, that's just the beginning of their evening. The first Superstar eliminated in that Triple Threat will be eliminated from becoming the next Captain X-Force Champion. Instead, he will then become the Special Guest Referee for the real Title match. Now do you see why that Special Guest Referee match tonight was so important? It's a preview of what is to come. So, the special guest referee will be in charge of the Title match, and the Title match will be a ladder match. But that's not it. The point of the ladder match will be to retrieve the Title, so that it can be used as a weapon in the final match. The person who retrieves the Title will have the advantage of using it in a traditional singles match, and his opponent will not be allowed to touch it or risk being DQed."
Xantaxm drinks from the water that was brought to him and then continues.
"Samoa Machine is poised to win this huge Captain X-Force Title match, and that will restore two Titles where I want them. Luther will defeat HawkEye for the Colonel Championship and Dyna Mike Duncan will defeat StrikerLT for the General X-Force Championship. Those two matches I am sure of and that brings the tally to four Titles that are coming home. The final match I want to say a few words about, however, is the Money in the Bank briefcase match. It is true that Psycho Savage is going to put his briefcase on the line against Brain Dead, but few other details are known. Well, here are some details. The match will be a Hardcore Ironman match. This is the first time this match has ever taken place in GHW history, and it will be full of carnage. If Black Dead should lose, or rather, when Black Dead loses, he has to give something up. He has a choice. He will either give up his job as a GHW Fighty fighty person, or he will have to join the X-Forces as a loyal subject....or more likely, our whipping boy. I know he doesn't have the guts to pick the first one, so when he agrees to choose the second, we will put him in hell as he has put Pennylane in hell. It's fun when the tables turn. Brain Dead, welcome to hell."
Xantaxm chugs the rest of his water.
"That is the inside scoop on Total Carnage. Next week, I will most likely hold another X-Force Summit Meeting to ready Xantland for World Warz III and address the new month's details. If anybody out there thinks or thought that changes were going to occur with the current establishment, then you were dead wrong. As I've said before, I've silenced and thwarted my opposers and I will step even harder on them if they try to raise their ugly heads. It's almost time for me and Xantland to rule the world."
Xantaxm gets up from the sofa and walks away.
EOT
"Good evening to all of you unintelligent Gods and Heretics Wrestling fans. I am speaking briefly tonight to fill in the blanks that have still been unanswered for this weekend's pay-per-view extravaganza, Total Carnage. Before I begin, let me first explain this big green concoction in front of me. It is a symbol of St. Patrick's Day, the day that is heralded by average joes and people of all descents. It doesn't matter what you had for dinner! Because it's just another excuse for you to go out and drink and try to forget the miserable lives that you're living. No one cares about the Irish or their traditions. No one cares who St. Patrick is. Heck, no one could even name one successful irishman. You don't see any successful Irish Superstars in GHW or any other feds. What happened to The Irishman in GHW? He disappeared under some rainbow and has never been seen since. It's a good damn thing there won't be a Team Ireland next month at World Warz because I don't think the country could bear to see the embarrassment. I won't get ahead of myself though. World Warz III is next month, and everyone knows that it's the year of Team Xantland. Anyhow, let me take a sip of this beer for the sake of everything not Irish."
Xantaxm grabs the mug and takes a hearty swig of it. Within seconds, he spits it out to the side of the sofa and makes a very bitter face. Then, anger sets in. Xantaxm puts the mug back on the table and shouts to crewman.
"Get this damn thing out of here! It tastes more like dye than it does beer! Get me a water!"
Xantaxm wipes his mouth, which is faintly colored green from the beer.
"As I was saying, the elite do not drink this kind of crap. It just goes to show that all of these countries that celebrate this Irish holiday are not truly patriotic. They embrace another country's culture mindlessly. In Xantland, we're all on the same page, and we are all focused on the same mission. That mission is to hold GHW gold and shut down the opposition. The Anti-X group has failed horribly in trying to stop us or bring me down, and this trend will continue. This brings me to Total Carnage. At Total Carnage, there will be a number of Titles that will come back to the X-Forces. The first is the Lieutenant X-Force Title. DUMB GANGSTA hasn't won a match in weeks, and the way he has lost his matches is enough to send him into early retirement. If I were he, I would just hand that Title back over and go find myself a new profession. Or maybe he could get back to his roots and live in the projects selling drugs and illegal firearms. In any event, YG will lose to whoever the #1 contender is from Combat, and the good thing is, all of those competitors are X-Force Superstars, so no matter what, the Lt. X-Force strap is coming home. The next Title that is coming home to the X-Forces is the Captain X-Force Championship. ForSakeN will defend the belt against Eric The Torture and Samoa Machine. The whole point of this segment was to address this match, so for those of you at home getting impatient, tough luck. I'll get to the point when I want to get to the point. These three Captain Superstars will fight in a triple threat match, but here's the thing, that's just the beginning of their evening. The first Superstar eliminated in that Triple Threat will be eliminated from becoming the next Captain X-Force Champion. Instead, he will then become the Special Guest Referee for the real Title match. Now do you see why that Special Guest Referee match tonight was so important? It's a preview of what is to come. So, the special guest referee will be in charge of the Title match, and the Title match will be a ladder match. But that's not it. The point of the ladder match will be to retrieve the Title, so that it can be used as a weapon in the final match. The person who retrieves the Title will have the advantage of using it in a traditional singles match, and his opponent will not be allowed to touch it or risk being DQed."
Xantaxm drinks from the water that was brought to him and then continues.
"Samoa Machine is poised to win this huge Captain X-Force Title match, and that will restore two Titles where I want them. Luther will defeat HawkEye for the Colonel Championship and Dyna Mike Duncan will defeat StrikerLT for the General X-Force Championship. Those two matches I am sure of and that brings the tally to four Titles that are coming home. The final match I want to say a few words about, however, is the Money in the Bank briefcase match. It is true that Psycho Savage is going to put his briefcase on the line against Brain Dead, but few other details are known. Well, here are some details. The match will be a Hardcore Ironman match. This is the first time this match has ever taken place in GHW history, and it will be full of carnage. If Black Dead should lose, or rather, when Black Dead loses, he has to give something up. He has a choice. He will either give up his job as a GHW Fighty fighty person, or he will have to join the X-Forces as a loyal subject....or more likely, our whipping boy. I know he doesn't have the guts to pick the first one, so when he agrees to choose the second, we will put him in hell as he has put Pennylane in hell. It's fun when the tables turn. Brain Dead, welcome to hell."
Xantaxm chugs the rest of his water.
"That is the inside scoop on Total Carnage. Next week, I will most likely hold another X-Force Summit Meeting to ready Xantland for World Warz III and address the new month's details. If anybody out there thinks or thought that changes were going to occur with the current establishment, then you were dead wrong. As I've said before, I've silenced and thwarted my opposers and I will step even harder on them if they try to raise their ugly heads. It's almost time for me and Xantland to rule the world."
Xantaxm gets up from the sofa and walks away.
EOT
