Post by Jaggeroth's wench. on Mar 15, 2012 18:19:05 GMT -5
The camera pans its way down the long corridor at a rapid pace, as some celebratory noise and music playing inside a room gets louder and louder. As it turns to the opened door, we find a long table decked out with a cake, like for a birthday, and crowded around having barrells of fun is several familiar Fighty fighty persons, including Wolverina, who appears to be the person to whom the cake is meant for. Not far from them is a huge flat screen and a XBOX360, to which some are playing COD on. And, of course, there's plenty of Mountain Dew, Pepsi and the works. The camera focuses in on Wolverina, who just so happens to look up at that exact moment, smiles brightly, and motions the camera and the underpaid operator of it to come closer. The camera man obliges.
"Hello everyone welcome to my party. Most of you already know it's my birthday, and thank you thank you thank you to all my fans for their internet messages and twitter feed wishes to me. Yaw are the bestest fans in the world! YES! Ah, but there's something else to celebrate besides my birth. See, today marks day number 71 of my Television Title reign wooooohoooo WOOT WOOT WOOT!"
As she roars proudly with endless energy, the crowd gathered round about her join in with hooting and hollering also. With another ever-so-cute smile across her face she motions for them to calm down as she delves deeper.
"That's right one and all. Your princess, the queen of wrestling, the greatest female Fighty fighty person of all times has risen to the rank of 6 in all-time longest TV Title reigns. Don't let people fool you, this is no easy feat. Do you know who all has held this very title yet could not keep it near as long as me? Metal Dragon, for one. The Psycho Kid, there's another good one. Dustin Delta and Hayden Hardkore? They couldn't even come close. Jack Tracks? Damn fine Fighty fighty person, but not even he could pull this off. And, of course, coming in at a oh-so-stellar 18 day title reign and reaching nowhere close to the 71 days I've accumulated is the walking shit-knuckle herself, Kahlan Clarkson."
The fans watching on the tron and at home roar at the insult and the cold hard facts.
"Just another reason I'm better than her. Wanted to just toss it out there since I'm sure we all have seen her little sex-for-glory bid to the big-wigs, and the contradictory cum-clusters she spat out of her mouth when trying to run that Britty Bitch mouth. Kahlan, you're not winning anyone over with statements such as 'I've beaten Wolfie so many times, but please please mister boss man don't put me in any matches with her, nor on the same plane, nor in the same locker room'. But I guess you're used to not winning anything, right Kahlan? So I'm just wasting my breath. Enough about the world's greatest coat tail rider, let's party! And Scally, no funny business tonight or I'll kick your face off. Now DEW ME SOMEBODY!"
The guys give her a quick, happy looks, thinking to themselves she meant "DO me" as in sexual in nature. Realizing her snafu, Haven hastily picked up a bottle of Mountain Dew and waved everyone off, causing groans of disappointment to abound.
EOT
YAY ME! I'm older.
"Hello everyone welcome to my party. Most of you already know it's my birthday, and thank you thank you thank you to all my fans for their internet messages and twitter feed wishes to me. Yaw are the bestest fans in the world! YES! Ah, but there's something else to celebrate besides my birth. See, today marks day number 71 of my Television Title reign wooooohoooo WOOT WOOT WOOT!"
As she roars proudly with endless energy, the crowd gathered round about her join in with hooting and hollering also. With another ever-so-cute smile across her face she motions for them to calm down as she delves deeper.
"That's right one and all. Your princess, the queen of wrestling, the greatest female Fighty fighty person of all times has risen to the rank of 6 in all-time longest TV Title reigns. Don't let people fool you, this is no easy feat. Do you know who all has held this very title yet could not keep it near as long as me? Metal Dragon, for one. The Psycho Kid, there's another good one. Dustin Delta and Hayden Hardkore? They couldn't even come close. Jack Tracks? Damn fine Fighty fighty person, but not even he could pull this off. And, of course, coming in at a oh-so-stellar 18 day title reign and reaching nowhere close to the 71 days I've accumulated is the walking shit-knuckle herself, Kahlan Clarkson."
The fans watching on the tron and at home roar at the insult and the cold hard facts.
"Just another reason I'm better than her. Wanted to just toss it out there since I'm sure we all have seen her little sex-for-glory bid to the big-wigs, and the contradictory cum-clusters she spat out of her mouth when trying to run that Britty Bitch mouth. Kahlan, you're not winning anyone over with statements such as 'I've beaten Wolfie so many times, but please please mister boss man don't put me in any matches with her, nor on the same plane, nor in the same locker room'. But I guess you're used to not winning anything, right Kahlan? So I'm just wasting my breath. Enough about the world's greatest coat tail rider, let's party! And Scally, no funny business tonight or I'll kick your face off. Now DEW ME SOMEBODY!"
The guys give her a quick, happy looks, thinking to themselves she meant "DO me" as in sexual in nature. Realizing her snafu, Haven hastily picked up a bottle of Mountain Dew and waved everyone off, causing groans of disappointment to abound.
EOT
YAY ME! I'm older.
