Post by Public Enemies on Apr 6, 2012 21:28:31 GMT -5
GHW TRIUMPH, MARCH 29TH, 2012. From the GHW ARENA IN BOSTON MASSACHUSETTS.
Sponsored by: Easter. Why in the hell is Total Carnage on April 8th? Who's the total fucking idiot that made this calendar?
MATCH ONE
TRIPLE THREAT
Jack Tracks vs. Michael Ian Ford vs. Mighty Man Millson II
Winner: No Contest. The reason I put Millson in this contest was to spur activity, it failed. I did like what Millson did in his entrance though.
MATCH TWO
~GHW TELEVISION CHAMPIONSHIP~
SINGLES MATCH
Wolverina (c) vs. Kahlan Clarkson
Tale of the Tape: Jamie Graves remains unaffected of Kahlan's comments towards his booking. No matter what, he says this match will happen. To pour salt in the wound, Jamie Graves has booked a Steel Cage Match between the two rivals at Total Carnage!
Winner: WINNER AND...NEW GHW TELEVISION CHAMPION...KAHLAN CLARKSON!!!
-Wolverina. Pissed. Read.-
The scene opens up to Wolverina steaming down the hallway with one hand on her head, the other one angrily tossing objects around randomly. Coors appears with a mic in hand to get some words... and... Coors hits the floor unconscious from Wolfie's patented Goodness Gracious Super-Kick. She had just come from the medical room, where the EMTs had checked her out, and by checked her out I mean fondled her breasts and buttocks instead of her swollen and possibly fractured head. As expected, she is pissed, no it's much worse than that. As she continues her travel the Queen of Extreme lets out occasional screams of anguish and frustration, until at last she nears her objective, which happens to be Jamie Graves' office. The General Manager is ready for Wolfie, after all a deaf person could hear Haven's screams from a mile away, and quickly swallows a handful of headache pills to stave off the effects of the coming interaction. The People's Princess forgoes the normal formalities of a knock on the door and simply barges in like a mad woman. Wolverina immediately slams both fists upon his desk and stares at him with eyes of rage and snarling lips.
"I'm not even going to bother with the fact the match should have been a DQ when she nailed that referee with the chair, or for the fact that Dreamer isn't even a referee. What they did was wrong on every possible level and you know it! I'm not going to ask you to reverse the decision or any of that other crap. No, I just want one thing, no two things. At Total Carnage, in that Steel Cage, I want you to make a stipulation, and that stipulation is this: If someone, anyone, interferes on Kahlan's behalf like they do EVERYTIME, the match will automatically be awarded to me as well as the Television Title. Now as for the other thing. I want you to draft up a legal contract that says I will not be held accountable for the things I am going to do to that BITCH at Total Carnage, because I plan on doing things that will be the very definition of.... criminal! I don't ask for much, Mr. Graves. I just go out there and perform. Please grant me these two things. Will you?"
Haven tries her best to compose herself from here, but her body is still quaking and tensing from the unimaginable fury welling up inside her.
"My original intention of assigning this match was to insure an official result. I wanted you two to compete. Well, now it appears that this stipulation will be used merely to keep others out."
Jamie Graves leans forward in his chair and place his hands in a steeple upon his desk.
"But I'll do you one better. At Total Carnage, if ANYONE attempts to interfere or alter your match anyway, whether in the interest of you or Kahlan, I will immediately terminate their contract from GHW. No gimme's, no exceptions, no excuses. However, I will not grant your legal contract. There will be no Disqualifications inside the cage. The only goal is to escape. I could care less what you do Kahlan inside the cage. You could beat her within an inch of her life and I would be unaffected."
"Sounds good?"
At long last Wolverina is able to ease up, straightening her body upright while sliding her tongue across her upper lip, salivating over the fact it would be a No DQ Steel Cage match with the added stips as well. It was all music to her ears. She smiles and nods.
"Finally, someone with some balls around here. I commend you for that. The ring crews will earn their keep at Total Carnage. Heck, you may even need to give them a raise for all the blood and gore and guts of Kahlan they'll have to clean up. Thank you. We're done here."
And with that, the Wolfster leaves the office chomping at the bits for Kahlan in the cage.
MATCH THREE
SINGLES MATCH
AJ Scally vs. Ryan Hughes
Tale of the Tape:
Winner: No Contest
=MAIN EVENT=
SINGLES MATCH
VS
Tale of the Tape: Once again, Dustin Delta receives a main event opponent. But this time its in the form of the Lord of The Flies, DOMINIK SANTIAGO!"
Winner: No Contest. This booking was my fault, for I forgot about Dustin Delta.
-An Emergency Response!-
Dustin Delta and Dominik Santiago match had just ended. The winner had his hand raised high in victory. Dominik Santiago had just made his way out of the arena through the black curtain when a monstrous honk was heard.
GHW cameras panned around the arena until they spotted an ambulance driving up next to the entrance. Red, blue, and orange lights were in disarray upon the Boston General Hospital ambulance as it came to a stop just before a crowd barrier.
"What in the world is this?"
"It's GHW, Al. Even we don't know what's going to happen."
The driver door opens and a familiar face arises from the cab. Jamie Graves pokes his head up out of the cab much like a prairie dog and slaps the lid of the cab. Graves stretches the spiral cord of the loudspeaker from inside to its fully extent as he dangles like an orangutang from the outside of the vehicle.
"It came to my attention this week that I hadn't set a stipulation for your match this Easter Sunday. Well, as you can see..."
"This Sunday the three of you, AJ Scally, Mighty Man Millson II, and of course you, Dustin Delta, will compete in a three-way ambulance match!"
A roar of cheers rises from the GHW crowd.
"Impossible you say? No, that's impossible. You'll see, you'll all see this Sunday!"
GHW cameras panned around the arena until they spotted an ambulance driving up next to the entrance. Red, blue, and orange lights were in disarray upon the Boston General Hospital ambulance as it came to a stop just before a crowd barrier.
"What in the world is this?"
"It's GHW, Al. Even we don't know what's going to happen."
The driver door opens and a familiar face arises from the cab. Jamie Graves pokes his head up out of the cab much like a prairie dog and slaps the lid of the cab. Graves stretches the spiral cord of the loudspeaker from inside to its fully extent as he dangles like an orangutang from the outside of the vehicle.
"It came to my attention this week that I hadn't set a stipulation for your match this Easter Sunday. Well, as you can see..."
"This Sunday the three of you, AJ Scally, Mighty Man Millson II, and of course you, Dustin Delta, will compete in a three-way ambulance match!"
A roar of cheers rises from the GHW crowd.
"Impossible you say? No, that's impossible. You'll see, you'll all see this Sunday!"
