Main Event - O'Neil vs. Hardkore

[oldmangoldberg]

GHW's Tuesday Night Havoc returns from a Commercial Break just before the main event.

JR: Welcome back to what is sure to be an incredible main event. I'm Jim Ross and i'm here with Jerry "The King" Lawler.

King: That's right, JR. We're live from the Kansas Coliseum in Wichita, Kansas. The next match is a submission single between Hayden Hardkore and Tai "The Knockout Kid" O'Neil.

JR: Hayden won his match last week against Michael Blake, however Tai O'Neil lost his tag team match against Hawkeye and Rurouni, and then was viciously beat down after the match.

King: But somehow I expect a good clean fight between these two. But we'll see in just a moment.

The lights dim down as Lillian Garcia puts the microphone to her lips.

Lillian Garcia: The following contest is scheduled for a submission single.

All for you by Our Lady Peace plays as black and white images of "The knockout kid" show up on the screen as the piano introduction comes to an end. The baseline starts as Tai O'Neil emerges. He smiles to the crowd and slowly walks down the ramp on one side. He slaps a few hands and then, without warning, jumps onto the barrier and looks out at the crowd as they cheer him on. He then jumps down and does the same on the other side.

Lillian Garcia: First from San Diego, California, standing six feet and zero inches tall and weighing in at two hundred and forty-nine pounds. He is the knockout kid, Tai O'Neil!

Tai is wearing a blue headband, blue wrestling trunks, blue and white elbow and knee pads, blue and white leather gloves all with a red fist design and blue and white wrestling boots without the design. He is also wearing his blue and white leather jacket with the red fist on the back, as well as a pair of black sunglasses.

As he approaches the ring, he runs up the steel steps, places both hands on the top rope and hops over it. He mounts onto the nearest turnbuckle, brushes the hair away from his face and smiles. He does this on all four corners before jumping down. He removes his leather jacket, which he hangs on the back of a turnbuckle and throws his shades to the crowd.

TBC by my Kiwi friend Hayden

[Hayden]

Jackasses page:
gahwo.proboards55.com/index.cgi?board=rpcontracts&action=display&thread=1166766877
Tai O'Neil's page:
gahwo.proboards55.com/index.cgi?board=rpcontracts&action=display&thread=1167030511


JR: This should be one hell of a match. We already know that Jackass is undefeated so far in GHW RP matches. We already know that the only submission match he has been in on GHW he won convincingly, King...what don't we know?
King: Try the outcome of this match. What a main event. Two of the very best in the business clashing head on. Two of the fan favourites, I'm torn. It's going to be like poetry in motion
JR: I didn't know you liked poetry King...
King: Umm, lets just focus on the match huh JR.

The first bar of 96 Quite Bitter Beings hits, with the lights dimming as the guitar riff plays. Jackass enters the arena, and the dimming lights turn into one single spotlight, focused on Jackass, the triumph championship glimmering around his waist in the light. Green and white searchlights scan out over the crowd in the arena, with the cameras every now and then picking up a glimpse of a screaming fan or a homemade banner. Jackass walks to the front of the entrance stage, taking big steps in time to the music, and the lights start to brighten a little. He draws an imaginary line on the ground with his left index finger, and steps over it with a cunning grin plastered on his face. Once over the imaginary line, Jackass jumps in the air, landing with both feet in the center of the stage.

Jackass is met with three sets of pyrotechnics, that go off one after the other, shooting out from the center of the stage diagonally towards the crowd. The first set is white, followed by green, followed by white again. Upon hitting the ground, Jackass breaks out into a run, quickly moving down the ramp towards the ring

Lillian Garcia: And introducing the opponent. Standing five feet, eleven inches tall and weighing in at two hundred and twenty five pounds... He is the Triumph Champion, the man known as Jackass. Hayden HardKore!

Jackass has made his way almost to the ring by the time Lillian has finished introducing him, and slides in under the bottom rope, coming up to one knee in the same motion as the slide. Keeping his eyes focused on Tai O'Neil, Jackass makes his way across the ring, testing the ropes on two opposite sides of the ring. Once settled down, Jackass approaches O'Neil, and without saying a word or batting an eye he extends a hand to him, as if to say "friendly competiton?"

King: Look at these two. I think they both have respect for each other's abilities, they want to have a great match as much as the fans want them to
JR: Well, that is if Tai O'Neil accepts Jackasses offer...

Jackass waits patiently for Tai to make a decision

TBC Marc, I'll let you start bud.

[oldmangoldberg]

Tai smiles as he claps Hayden's hand. They shake and then back off from eachother as they begin to move around in a circle, never taking their eyes off eachother. They lunge for a lock-up but Hayden quickly ducks and grabs Tai around the waist, picks him up turns and slams him down with a spinebuster. Hayden gets to his feet and turns to the crowd.

King: What a quick, smart, powerful move, JR.

In the meantime, Tai has rolled onto his shoulders and jumped back to his feet, he stands behind Hayden, waiting. Hayden turns around and is hit with a fury of punches and Tai then delivers a Russian leg sweep.

JR: Never take your eyes off your opponent. Especially at the beginning of a match.

Tai immidiately goes to work as he crawls up behind Hayden, locks in a full nelson on the ground and then wraps his legs around Hayden's waist to complete the Full Nelson Chickenwing.

King: He doesn't seriously think he can win the match right now does he?

JR: Of course not, King! He's just wearing down his opponent.

The referee checks on Hayden...

TBC by Hayden, sorry so short.

[Hayden]

The pain is clear on Hayden's face, as the ref checks that he doesn't want to tap out. Hayden's face strains with effort as he moves towards the ropes. He takes afew steps before having a better idea, falling backwards and landing with his body on top of Tai O'Neil. This causes O'Neil to break the hold, and Hayden manages to scramble to his feet, massaging his right shoulder slightly while keeping an eye on his opponent

JR: Looks like that took something out of Jackass, if Tai O'Neil manages to continue to target Jackasses shoulder, he could pick his opponent apart piece by piece
King: But you have to expect Jackass to be a little more careful from now on, he knows as well as we do what Tai O'Neil is capable of

As Tai staggers to a vertical base, Jackass runs towards the ropes in an attempt to keep on top of his opponent. He rebounds off the second rope, lunging back at O'Neil and hitting him with a running clothesline. The impact of the move flips O'Neil over, causing him to land face down on the floor of the ring.
Jackass then runs back to the same rope, rebounding off it once more. After gathering some speed, Jackass launches himself into a Handspring, launching himself across the ring until he until he is close enough to land on his opponent with a splash. The momentum he is carrying causes Jackass to roll off the side of O'Neil, coming to a halt next to the ringropes.

JR: What athleticism, A Handspring Splash like that... He could make the olympics!
King: Impresssive stuff indeed JR, but that won't win him any submission matches.

Both men take their time getting to their feet, but Jackass is slightly faster, with Tai O'Neill still feeling the effects of Jackasses onslaught. Hayden locks up with O'Neill, looking to Irish Whip him into the ropes. O'Neill reverses the move, sending Jackass into the ropes instead. Jackass bounces off, and Tai is waiting for him. He uses Hayden's momentum along with his own strength to land a Belly-to-Belly suplex on Hayden, slamming him onto the canvas hard on Jackasses back.

King: What an impact, O'Neill is so dangerous, when you least expect it, he will pull something like that out from nowhere!

Tai closes in on Hayden, looking to take advantage of him while his opponent is down on the mat

[oldmangoldberg]

OOC: The Full Nelson was on the ground, but whatever

Tai locks in a single leg crab on Hayden's left leg, but with the other arm free he grabs Hayden's right arm and pulls with all his force, this causing pain to Hayden's already injured shoulder. Hayden screams in pain. The ref checks to see if he's ready to give in. Hayden furiously shakes his head, as he inches his way towards the rope. His hand touches the rope and the ref calls for the hold to be broken. Tai immidiately releases, as Hayden quickly rolls out of the ring grabbing his shoulder.

JR: See, King, i told you if Tai capitolized on Hayden's shoulder, he would gain the upper hand.

King: Yes, but Hayden was smart to leave the ring, gives him a chance to recover.

JR: Look at the respect between these two superstars. Tai is giving Hayden a chance to recoop.

King: That might not be respect JR, it might just be sheer stupidity.

JR: King...

As the ref's count reaches 9, Hayden slides back into the ring. He nods at Tai as they circle around eachother. They lock up and Tai quickly headbutts Hayden. Hayden stumbles before recieving an elbow to the face. Tai grabs Hayden head, they both bend their knees, Tai jumps up onto Hayden's knees and flips over his head. Standing behind Hayden, Tai trips him and quickly locks in a leglock. But Hayden is close enough to grab the rope.

King: What a smart move by Tai, if Hayden hadn't been so close to the rope, we might've seen the end.

Tai is the first to his feet, as he lifts Hayden up, Hayden delivers three swift punches to O'Neil's midsection and face. Before The knockout kid can regain balance, Hayden grabs his head under his arm and delivers a thundering bulldog, landing Tai in the middle of the ring. Without wasting a minute, he locks in a sharpshooter.

JR: This could be it, King

King: I think that bulldog really winded him.

Tai looks like he might not be able to handle the pain. A chant of "Knockout Kid" fills the arena. Tai slams one fist to the mat, followed by the second one. He places both hands flat on the mat and pushes himself up, like a push up. Hayden, seemingly losing his grip, tightens the hold and shakes his head. Tai continues to do push ups and then with all his strength, curls and rolls towards Hayden, causing Hayden to flip over Tai, and land where Tai's head was a few seconds ago. Before Hayden can distance himself from Tai, Tai switches the submission to a Figger Four leglock in his favour.

JR: Oh my god, King! Can you believe that, Tai O'Neil just reversed the sharpshooter into a figure four leg lock!

TBC by Hayden

[Hayden]

OOC: My bad, I missed that bit...just had it pictured in my head of a standing full nelson chickenwing.

As soon as the figure-four is locked in, Tai O'Neil applies pressure. Jackass wriggles around the ring in pain, trying desperately to reach out for the ringropes, but he is too far away. Jackass gathers his bearings and rethinks his strategy, the pain etched onto his face. Instinctively, he reaches down to his legs, where the centre of the pain is coming from. He starts trying to pull O'Neils legs away from his own, but the hold is locked in too tightly.
The ref asks Hayden if he wants to tap out, and is met with a pain fulled yell of "aah, no!". Jackass summons all the strngth he has and tries to turn the move over, changing the focus of the move in his favour instead.

JR: What a vicious hold that is King, most people would have tapped out to a figure four by now
King: Jackass is fighting purely on heart. And if what Amanda says is true, he has the biggest heart of any Fighty fighty person in the business today
JR: Just look at this King, I think he is turning this move over!

Jackass has managed to get some leverage and is using all the strength he has to turn the figure four leg lock over. Finally, he manages to reverse the move, pushing the pressure onto Tai O'Neil instead of himself.

King: We are seeing a technical masterpiece here tonight JR! Both of these men are at the top of their games, and have the other man scouted.
JR: It is going to be difficult to win this one for sure King, the momentum of the match seems to be flowing back and forth between these two

Jackass applies the pressure of the figure four leg lock and Tai O'Neil instantly starts searching for a rope to break the move. After struggling his way towards the side of the ring, Tai manages to ges an arm across the rope, and the hold is broken by the ref. Both men are feeling the effects of the move, each holding their shins in pain. They take their time to get to their feet, as the fans cheer them on.

JR: This is the part of the match that may determine who controls the momentum from here on out. Whoever gets the upper hand and manages to capitalise on their opponent can take advantage of the energy that that figure four has sapped from both men
King: And listen to the crowd JR, they are loving this display of wrestling ability here, I'm not even sure who they are cheering for more... it seems pretty 50/50.

Ever so slowly, both men claw their way back to their feet...

tbc Marc

[oldmangoldberg]

Hayden and Tai both crawl to opposite ends of the ring. They use the ropes to get back to their feet and immidiately having the same idea, bounce off the ropes and crash in mid-air in an attempt to hit a cross body block. Both men, down again, the crowd still cheers their names. Again, both men crawl towards a rope.

King: Here we go again, JR.

JR: Hopefully they won't have the same idea this time, King.

Someone yells from the crowd: "Do it for Amanda" This seems to give Hayden just the extra amount of strength to run towards Tai, just as he is getting up, jumping up onto his knee and then striking his head. Hayden falls but is ready to get back up, Tai however has sustained damage.

King: What a well executed Shining Wizard, JR.

JR: That's right, King, he seemed to get an extra bit of strength knowing that Amanda was watching.

Hayden gets to his feet and strikes Tai a few times in the head, before lifting him up and irish whipping him to the ropes. Tai manages to hold onto the ropes to stop from bouncing back. Hayden runs towards Tai, who is catching his breath, expecting to clothesline him out of the ring. But Tai manages to duck, pulling the top rope down with him. Thus, when Hayden comes towards Tai, it allows him to throw Hayden over the top rope and out of the ring. Tai collapses as the ref begins to count.

King: This could be it, JR. The end of the match.

JR: But if Hayden gets back into the ring without Tai on his feet, Tai could be in trouble.

The referee reaches a five count.

TBC by Hayden, a little short

[Hayden]

OOC: nice touch with the Amanda thing Marc

Hayden is getting to his feet on the outside of the ring as the ref reaches the count of 5. Hearing the ref's call, he picks up the pace a little, sliding into the ring on the count of 7, on the opposite side of the ring to Tai. Just like his entrance, Jackass slides up onto one knee in the same motion, and Tai stirs and starts to stagger to his feet at the same time.

King: Well both men are getting to their feet again. JR, brace yourself, I have a feeling that these two are about to explode again in the centre ring any second
JR: I am inclined to agree with you King. How much more of this can these guys take?

Jackass, with the momentum in his favour runs across the ring targeting Tai as he gets to his feet. Tai has Jackass well scouted and stands up tall just as Jackass reaches him, flipping Jackass over his shoulder so that he lands on his back. With Jackass on the ground, Tai looks to loosen Jackass up a little by stomping on his injured shoulder. He gets in afew stomps before Jackass rolls out of the way and crawls to his knees.

JR: Tai O'Neil is still looking to target that bad shoulder of Jackass. Looks like Tai came into this match with a gameplan

Jackass backs away from Tai, as he gets back to his feet. Tai back Jackass into a corner and neither man takes his eyes off the other. Tai moves first, looking to grapple Jackass, but Jackass parrys the hold and ducks down low, grabbing Tai by the ankle and tipping him to the mat in one swoop. He still has a hold of Tai's ankle and twists it, putting O'Neil in an ankle lock and draggging him away from the ropes before Tai can react to the move.

JR: An ankle lock King, I can only imagine the pain that Tai O'Neil is feeling right about now

The ref comes over and checks if O'Neil wants to tap out, but O'Neil clears him away with a swipe of his hand and kicks out of the move with his free foot. Jackass hurtles backwards into the turnbuckle, locking his arms around the ropes to stop him from falling forward, as Tai raches down to brace his ankle. Jackass gathers his thoughts for a short moment and leaps to the top turnbuckle before O'Neil realises what is happening. Tai gingerly steps onto his bad foot, testing it out as he makes his way to his feet. Jackass lines up his target and jumps off the turnbuckle, landing with a legdrop over the bad ankle of Tai O'Neil.

King: And the quick thinking Jackass strikes again. Tell you what JR, you cannot leave any part of your body exposed to this guy.
JR: No, you can't King. Jackass senses a weakness and will pick his opponents apart piece by piece if given the opportunity. He is a master at it
King: And that is why he is so dangerous in the ring, thats why he's so successful

Tai grips the ankle in pain falling back over sideways, so he is lying on his side, holding his bad leg in his hands. Hayden hesitates slightly before moving in on Tai, looking to lock in another submission move. The hesitation is enough to give Tai a small window of opportunity and he strikes, dropping Jackass to the ground by hooking his feet with his free leg. Jackass hits the ground hard, not giving himself time to break his fall as he was taken by suprise.

JR: Wow! Where did that come from?
King: There is a glimmer of that martial arts training paying off for Tai O'Neil

Now both men are on the ground once more, trying desperately to shake off the effects of the match so far and get to their feet...

tbc Marc

[oldmangoldberg]

OOC: Warning, this is going to be a short post, just that little extra bit to set me up for the win. Sorry Hayden in advance, it's gonna be a cheesy ending

Both men are down, Tai closest to the ropes and Jackass just on the other side. Tai uses the ropes to pull himself up. Hayden also gets up, but without use of the rope he isn't as quick. Hayden is faced away from Tai, still a little woozy. Tai now standing behind Jackass, he slowly bends the leg with the injured ankle, just slightly. He then crosses his arms in an X against his body and then pulls them out above his head in a flexing position, but without having his hands clenched and without actually flexing.

King: Uh... What is he doing, JR?

JR: I haven't the foggyest idea, King. But what I do know, is that if Jackass turns around, it's all over.

Hayden slowly turns around, takes one look at Tai and raises an eyebrow, he is trying to figure out what Tai is doing. Just as he figures it out, Tai jumps up switches feet quickly, kicking Hayden hard in the Sternum, Hayden flies back and is out cold. Tai collapses from landing on his bad ankle, but without waiting he crawls quickly to Jackass and tries again with the Full Nelson Chickenwing, he locks in the full nelson with Hayden on the ground and then wraps his legs around Hayden's waist.

JR: Oh my gawd, did you see that, King? He pulled off a crane kick, hitting Jackass hard in the chest.

King: I did, indeed, JR, and I'm sure that this is the end.

TBC by Hayden or End Match.

[Hayden]

OOC: Really not giving me much to work with here, Im out cold and locked in a finishing submission hold... hmmm. Great, what a crap way to end my undefeated streak!

[oldmangoldberg]

OOC: Sorry Hayden, you could always start a chant... or msn me, we could discuss there... Wasn't expecting you to be on, my bad

[oldmangoldberg]

I'll probably end up losing now.... hmph, that sucks

[Hayden]

OOC: all good, im not at my cpu, so don t have msn atm. Dont worry, I have an idea. I think this match has afew last posts in it yet

Hayden's face is expressionless as he lies out cold on the mat from the crane kick. Tai has the Full Nelson Chickenwing locked in, and is putting all of his effort into making Hayden tap. But there is no reaction from Hayden.

JR: My god King! Hayden isn't flinching from that move! He hasn't even opened his eyes. Either he is the hardest man alive or...
King: Or he's out cold JR. A man can't tap out if he can't respond. And unfortunately for Tai, thats the only way to win this match

Tai is taken aback by the lack of response, and sets about to wake Hayden up. He slaps hayden across the face, but gets no response. The ref is about to call for the ball to sound to end the match, with Hayden unable to compete any longer, when he hears a groan coming from the ground where Hayden is lying. Hayden stirs slowly and opens his eyes slightly. Tai pounces on his opportunity and locks in the hold once more, this time getting the desired reaction from Hayden. As soon as the hold is locked in, Hayden's lifgeless body kicks into life, flailing about on the floor in pain.

JR: This is how much the match means to these men, neither one is willing to give in, we could be here all night
King: Personally, I could watch these guys beat the snot out of each other all night

Tai is applying pressure to the hold, and Hayden manages to free an arm, clawing out at the rope in desperation. With the other hand, he has it raised, as if he is about to tap.

King: Jackass has got to get to that rope quickly, look, I don't think even he can bear this pain for much longer

With a final lunge, Hayden grabs a hold of the rope, holding it tightly, so that his knuckles turn white. Frustratedly, Tai brakes the hold and is told to back off by the ref. Hayden has grabbed the rope under his arm, and is not letting go. The ref drops down to check if he is still fit to compete, but Hayden rolls out of the ring to avoid him and gather himself. He is crouching on the outside of the ring, but Tai feels that he has had enough and follows him outside. He comes up behind Hayden and grabs the back of his head. Hayden is caught unawares, but out of a reflex action, reaches one fist up to his shoulder, catching Tai O'Neil right on the end of the nose. Tai backs off as blood starts to pour out of his nose from the shot.

JR: Wow, I don't even think Jackass knew what he was doing there...He may have broken Tai O'Neil's nose!

Jackass turns to face O'Neil, somewhat suprised to see Tai holding his face. Tai lets go of his nose as Jackass approaches him with his hands raised in a fighting stance. Tai dons his own fighting stance, looking to either block or reverse JAckasses attack, blood pouring from his face, down his chest and onto the floor below. Instead of punching Tai, Jackass opts for a diferent approach, hitting O'Neil with a quick kick to the back of each of Tai's knees. Tai drops to one knee as his right leg buckles momentarily from the shot. Jackass runs towards Tai and steps off the exposed knee, hitting Tai with a shining Wizard to the side of the head.

King: That's Jackasses Shining Wizard combo. This one is not over yet, I don't think

tbc Marc, come on...we can geet afew good replys in before the match ends

[oldmangoldberg]

Tai is laying on his belly, after the shining wizard, he rolls over to try and stop the bleeding, he grabs the rope and shimmies across to his jacket, still hanging on the turnbuckle. He reaches into his jacket pocket, the ref stands there eyeing him like a hawk. Tai pulls out kleenex, he quickly stuffs two bits into his nose which stops the bleeding. He turns to face Jackass, who is standing in a basic shoot wrestling position waiting for Tai. Tai bends his right leg which becomes his back leg and straightens the other, he puts his right fist in the air, over his head and pointing at Hayden, the other arm straight out to Jackass motioning for him to make the first move. Hayden comes running, but is quickly met with a right elbow to his right cheek. Hayden grabs it in pain, then anger shows and he is about to strike when he is hit with Tai's left elbow to his left cheek. This time the spit flies from Hayden's mouth. Tai not wasting any time steps back a tiny bit and bends his knees, taking him really low to the ground, he jumps up hitting Jackass in mid chest with a dropkick. Hayden stumbles a bit before falling, the hit was not as hard as Tai had wanted. They are both up again immidiately.

JR: Wow, i thought this match was over when Tai hit that crane kick..

King: Me too, JR. And how wrong we were.

This time Hayden has the quick advantage, he jumps on Tai with a headlock and flips him over his hip, performing a "takedown". Hayden, still holding the head lock, begins to punch Tai in the head. He finally releases the head lock and rolls down Tai's legs, grabbing his injured ankle, flipping him over and applying pressure. Tai, not wanting to forego anymore pain to his ankle, uses his free foot to kick Hayden in the head. Hayden, doesn't sustain much damage, but backs off anyways. Tai puts his hands down flat in front of him and pushes slighly and pulls his feet up, so that he is in a crouching position, from there he stands and turns around. He immidiately hits the ground hard as Hayden hits him with a spear. Hayden climbs off Tai, as he smoothly rolls out of the ring. The ref starts to count. Hayden in the ring and Tai out walking on the floor. Tai tests his ankle and finds that the pain is barrable. Hayden's attention slips as the ref's count reaches 8, Tai reaches as high as can, grabbing the top rope. He pulls down, and then lets the momentum pull him up, he uses the top rope as a springboard launching himself towards Jackass. He flips in mid air grabbing Hayden's neck and landing a neckbreaker.

JR: Did you see that, King? A slingshot neckbreaker. Very few people have gotten up after a move like that.

King: That's right, JR. But don't count Hayden out yet. If anyone gets up from this, it'll be him.

TBC or End Match.

[Hayden]

Tai lands awkwardly from the move and is slow to get up. Hayden has borne the brunt of the damage, and is once again lying helpless in the middle of the ring. Tai steps to his feet slightly dazed, but shakes it off, looking once more to finish Jackass off

JR: If this was a regular match, all Tai O'Neil would have to do is roll over and he would pick up the pinfall. But this is not a regular match King
King: No, its not, both of these men have given all of their hearts here tonight. Neither of these men will be the same again. One of these men will tap out before the night is done...Its the only way

Tai slowly walks over to Jackass, still stepping lightly on his bad leg. He reaches Jackass and stands above him. Tai drags Jackass forward a little and sits him up, into a sitting position. He stands behind Jackass and grabs both of his arms, putting them in position fot a double chickenwing. From somewhere, Jackass tenses his arm muscles to prevent his arms being twisted back any further, then, summoning all the strength he has left, he brings his arms forward. This sees Tai launched forward, falling into the ropes in front of Jackass. he bounces backwards and hits his head hard on the ground as Jackass rolls out of the way.

King: What! That is pure heart, I just don't know how Jackass keeps on coming. Hes running on eveready batteries or something!

Jackass steps up onto one knee, as Tai holds his head from the pain of it hitting the ground. With a half-groan, half-yell, Jackass gets to his feet. The noise makes Tai take notice, and he backs away into the corner, using the trunbuckle to stand himself up also. Both me look at each other, the pain of a hard fought match etched in each other's faces. There is a short nod from each man, as if they are acknowledging each other's efforts in the match, before they both run at each other. Both men collide in center ring, each trying to hit a variation of a cross-body attack on the other. The collision causes both men to collapse in a heap on the ground. Both men lie still in the ring, dazed and confused. A chorus of painful groans travels out to the crowd from both men

King: Quick, somebody...anybody, lock in a hold!

TBC or End